It was all I could seem to
remember. I could not see why our parting had been necessary. I
wonder if you can understand. It was as if I had been reborn into a
new set of beliefs. All that had seemed inevitable and great had grown
trivial. I could not see distinctions as I had. God made us--English,
French, Indians. I could not understand what patriotism stood for,
after all. I did not know what had come upon my mind, but I saw that
words that I had thought worth sacrificing life for had lost their
meaning. And so--and so---- You see what I would say. I have
changed. If you wish to lead the tribes you are not to think of me."
I rose and drew her to me. "But, Mary, I no longer wish to lead the
tribes."
She could not understand me, as indeed I could not wholly understand
myself. She looked at me gravely and long, and she tried to find the
truth in me,--the truth that was out of sight; the truth about myself
that even I did not know.
"Was the commandant right?" she queried. "Is it anxiety about me that
has changed your plans?"
I could only shake my head at her. "I am not sure." Then I sat beside
her and tried to explain. "Simon is dead, Pierre died saving me.
Leclerc and Labarthe died under torture.
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