He called to me, and said, Be secret; I charge you, Pamela; and don't go
in yet, as I told you.
O how poor and mean must those actions be, and how little must they make
the best of gentlemen look, when they offer such things as are unworthy
of themselves, and put it into the power of their inferiors to be greater
than they!
I took a turn or two in the garden, but in sight of the house, for fear
of the worst; and breathed upon my hand to dry my eyes, because I would
not be too disobedient. My next shall tell you more.
Pray for me, my dear father and mother: and don't be angry I have not yet
run away from this house, so late my comfort and delight, but now my
terror and anguish. I am forced to break off hastily.
Your dutiful and honest DAUGHTER.
LETTER XII
DEAR MOTHER,
Well, I will now proceed with my sad story. And so, after I had dried my
eyes, I went in, and began to ruminate with myself what I had best to do.
Sometimes I thought I would leave the house and go to the next town, and
wait an opportunity to get to you; but then I was at a loss to resolve
whether to take away the things he had given me or no, and how to take
them away: Sometimes I thought to leave them behind me, and only go with
the clothes on my back, but then I had two miles and a half, and a byway,
to the town; and being pretty well dressed, I might come to some harm,
almost as bad as what I would run away from; and then may-be, thought I,
it will be reported, I have stolen something, and so was forced to run
away; and to carry a bad name back with me to my dear parents, would be a
sad thing indeed!--O how I wished for my grey russet again, and my poor
honest dress, with which you fitted me out, (and hard enough too it was
for you to do it!) for going to this place, when I was not twelve years
old, in my good lady's days! Sometimes I thought of telling Mrs.
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