Mrs. Jewkes is one of the most obliging creatures in the world; and I
have such respects shewn me by every one, as if I was as great as Lady
Davers--But now, if this should all end in the sham-marriage!--It cannot
be, I hope. Yet the pride of greatness and ancestry, and such-like, is
so strongly set out in Lady Davers's letter, that I cannot flatter myself
to be so happy as all these desirable appearances make for me. Should I
be now deceived, I should be worse off than ever. But I shall see what
light this new honour will procure me!--So I'll get ready. But I won't,
I think, change my garb. Should I do it, it would look as if I would be
nearer on a level with him: and yet, should I not, it might be thought a
disgrace to him: but I will, I think, open the portmanteau, and, for the
first time since I came hither, put on my best silk nightgown. But then
that will be making myself a sort of right to the clothes I had
renounced; and I am not yet quite sure I shall have no other crosses to
encounter. So I will go as I am; for, though ordinary, I am as clean as
a penny, though I say it. So I'll e'en go as I am, except he orders
otherwise. Yet Mrs. Jewkes says, I ought to dress as fine as I can.--But
I say, I think not. As my master is up, and at breakfast, I will venture
down to ask him how he will have me be.
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