Suppose, said she, I had married my father's groom! what would you have
said to that?--I could not have behaved worse, replied he, than you have
done. And would you not have thought, said she, I had deserved it.
Said he, Does your pride let you see no difference in the case you put?
None at all, said she. Where can the difference be between a beggar's
son married by a lady, or a beggar's daughter made a gentleman's wife?
Then I'll tell you, replied he; the difference is, a man ennobles the
woman he takes, be she who she will; and adopts her into his own rank, be
it what it will: but a woman, though ever so nobly born, debases herself
by a mean marriage, and descends from her own rank to his she stoops to.
When the royal family of Stuart allied itself into the low family of
Hyde, (comparatively low, I mean,) did any body scruple to call the lady,
Royal Highness, and Duchess of York? And did any body think her
daughters, the late Queen Mary and Queen Anne, less royal for that?
When the broken-fortuned peer goes into the city to marry a rich
tradesman's daughter, be he duke or earl, does not his consort
immediately become ennobled by his choice? and who scruples to call her
lady, duchess, or countess?
But when a duchess or countess dowager descends to mingle with a person
of obscure birth, does she not then degrade herself? and is she not
effectually degraded? And will any duchess or countess rank with her?
Now, Lady Davers, do you not see a difference between my marrying my dear
mother's beloved and deserving waiting-maid, with a million of
excellencies about her, and such graces of mind and person as would adorn
any distinction; and your marrying a sordid groom, whose constant train
of education, conversation, and opportunities, could possibly give him no
other merit, than that which must proceed from the vilest, lowest taste,
in his sordid dignifier?
O the wretch! said she, how he finds excuses to palliate his meanness!
Again, said he, let me observe to you, Lady Davers, When a duke marries a
private person, is he not still her head, by virtue of being her husband?
But, when a lady descends to marry a groom, is not the groom her head,
being her husband? And does not the difference strike you? For what
lady of quality ought to respect another, who has made so sordid a
choice, and set a groom above her? For, would not that be to put that
groom upon a par with themselves?--Call this palliation, or what you
will; but if you see not the difference, you are blind; and a very unfit
judge for yourself, much more unfit to be a censurer of me.
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