25 in the Currency of the Realm, while the Brain-Worker who leads
out a Spavined Horse and puts in 20 Minutes at tall Bunko Work, can
clean up $14.50 and then sit on the Porch all Afternoon, reading "The
Lives of the Saints."
Also Hezekiah led up to the Altar a Hold-Over whose Eyes refused to
work as a Duet and whose Figure had all of the graceful Ins and
Outs of a Flag-Pole, but she owned half of the Land in the Township.
Hezekiah said something about the Beauty that fadeth even as a Flower,
and then he connected with her Property.
[Illustration: _Hezekiah._]
When grim-visaged War showed its awful Front, Hezekiah went down to
the Court-House and hollered for the Union until he was black in the
Face. He showed all the emotional Farm Hands where to sign their Names
and promised to keep them supplied with Blue Overcoats, Beans, Navy
Plug and Hard Tack until the whole Works had been saved. Every time
there was a new Call for Men, he took a firmer hold on the Commissary
Department and began to gouge the Government in a new Place.
The Heroes who came home full of Malaria and Lead were met at the
Station by Hezekiah, who had grown a Chin Whisker and was sporting
a White Vest. He gave each one a Card announcing that all of our
country's Brave Defenders who had failed to become well fixed on $13
per, would get what Money they needed at 2 per cent. a Month, with
Real Estate as Security.
[Illustration: _This Year's Crop.
Pages:
76
77
78
79
80
81
82
83
84
85
86
87
88
89
90
91
92
93
94
95
96
97
98
99
100