This did sweetly
revive my spirit, and help me to hope in God; which when I had with
comfort mused on a while, that word fell with great weight upon my
mind, O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?
1 Cor. xv. 55. At this I became both well in body and mind at
once, for my sickness did presently vanish, and I walked
comfortably in my work for God again.
261. At another time, though just before I was pretty well and
savoury in my spirit, yet suddenly there fell upon me a great cloud
of darkness, which did so hide from me the things of God and
Christ, that I was as if I had never seen or known them in my life:
I was also so over-run in my soul with a senseless heartless frame
of spirit, that I could not feel my soul to move or stir after
grace and life by Christ; I was as if my loins were broken, or as
if my hands and feet had been tied or bound with chains. At this
time also I felt some weakness to seize upon my outward man, which
made still the other affliction the more heavy and uncomfortable to
me.
262. After I had been in this condition some three or four days,
as I was sitting by the fire, I suddenly felt this word to sound in
my heart, I must go to Jesus.
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